... part time blues

Where do i go nobody knows,
I’ve gotta’ say I’m on my way down,

God give me style and give me grace,


God put a smile upon my face ..



u know whats required to sustain a relationship?!? ... just willingness

and now answere urself

irony

hi... i just wanted to be with myself for a few minutes... so thot i shud talk to u..

ironical rt?

what if this irony repeats itself everyday?

office, incompetencies and life

ya.. its tiring...
...its tiring to keep fighting against time to achieve goals made distant by incompetencies all around... its tiring to put up with ppl who lack sincerity and its tiring to talk to ppl who care a damn that they do...
...working for almost 16hrs a day ... its literally tiring...

am in office rt now.. ya ya.. i know i need not have said that....

talking abt incompetencies... i believe its relative...
a person more competent than you, can make you look incompetent.. and the success lies in makin as many people 'look' incometent as possible..
well.. sun tzu never wrote an "art of working in a professional environment" else the above dictum wud surely have found a place.. :)... pat ur back mr chaturvedi

coming back to real thngs.. for eg life... the best things in life, as usual, are least expected. i dont think many wud agree to this... i dont.
the question being..then why dont we all realise this and try makin evey moment as unexpected as it can become?!?!.... only because then it wont be unexpected anymore :)... its called random...

and here i have found smthn really good in life which is ... neither random nor UNEXPECTED... an intended search for a goal... leads me to the goal.. and i am happy.. thats good rt?

so while she is arnd.. sweetly tucked in a corner with her eyes closed... while life remains a war against incompetencies, restlessness and smtimes urself....while u know that life is not only a war and there are the pure sands of sam dunes to give you peace... and while u know that there are worse thngs in life apart from the above mentioned wars.. such as media, i'd just like to end on another positive note...

children make so much sense... :)

all i will crave for..

all i will crave for is a kiss...

when u have run around half the world and are too tired even to sleep....
when i have spent another successful day being not what i am but still having enjoyed every moment of it...
when another hit will cause me to shake up from my reverie..when some strange thoughts will begin haunting me again and i wud want to run away...
when learning would mean much more than myself and even more of the world ...when number of friends would mean nothing more than the number of parties i attend...
when logic would defy itself and i will feel the need to start all over again...
when i would have grown as a person but not as a professional... and when i would have grown as a professional but not as a person...
when i wud forget to call my parents and remember my appointments, when i wud surprise my mom with a visit for no reason ...
when i would be as big as i had dreamt to be ... and when my dreams would have grown even larger with time...
when i wud feel like reaching out for silence and not myself ... when i wud want to freak out and let go of myself ... when we wud be far away but closer than ever ... when i wud feel that i still don't know you..and feel the same for myself....
when peace would mean nothing more than u in my arms...when i wud need the strength to set things right for u.. when i wud see u on top of the world coz i was the one who set things right for you....all i will crave for is a kiss.... and i'll set things right for... ahem...well...to cut a long story short ..... feel like kissing you ...

...still got the sand in my shoes

.. wht do we do for the new year?
.. i wanna sit in the desert sand and have a drink
.. done

...this is how the decision was made, hardly 3 days before 1st jan 2006...

this was my first trip to rajasthan and was to cover jodhpur and jaisalmer... diamond merchant nandi and i enter the train from bandra and the journey begins...

to begin with.. someone called DM is a cotravellar, and she is gifted with ESP... nandi, who himself is a very intuitive person, finds someone who can look into his eyes for the first time and tell every thing about him in a speech lasting about 5 to 6 minutes... and i am forced to acknowledge that she is right...

well... the 18hrs didnt take as long as they usually do... and i step onto the land called Suryanagri (or Jodhpur/Suncity as is commonly known) ... at dawn on 31st dec 2005

first on agenda is reaching sam dunes at jaisalmer…
we (group of 4 now) travel by road.. SUV .. from Jodhpur to jaisalmer … roads always fascinate me… and more so in rajasthan when u can see vast stretches of land..unhindered.. reaching out to kiss the low lieing bright skies.. love life in slow motion… the jeep was traveling at 90+

on the way is a place called Manvar (pronounced as Maanvar – which means welcome) … amazing place.. done up like a rajasthani traditional haveli cum village area.. a place with just the right combination of intimacy and distance…
you know what... the essence of rajasthan is ‘the culture of respect’.. everybody gives it and everybody expects it back… and with this respect comes a certain amnt of distance.. something that a son might feel from his father …
well.. Maanvar lives upto rajsathan.. and we spend 3 hours celebrating the solitude with conversation and antiquity…

...and then we are on the road again… and this time stop at a rajsathani highway dhaba… I need not say more…the best meal I have had in the past year or so…

we reach jaisalmer and its almost 9 pm now… we had planned to go to Sam Dunes so that we can have a camp fire, drink along, and talk … sitting on the pure desert sand… and enjoy a few moments of life…
they have paid camp/tents over there…with camp fire and music and all that jazz.. this was the only let down of the entire trip

If you happen to go to Sam at night… during winters.. please carry couple of bundles of firewood … making a campfire of ur own among any of those dunes is the only way to enjoy it… paid tents are firstly not in the sand and secondly there's too much crowd.. with almost 20 tents in a small area…

We came back… tired .. exhausted… happy but .. I still wanted the sand…

I sleep....


Next day morning we go to the Lodrava Parshwanath temple .. a peaceful, serene place… with a 1000 year history and a baggage of myth and faith… a kalpavriksha that fulfills all wishes, a pair of “naag” that have been appearing for over 400yrs now … invasions by Muhammad Ghori and one more chap..forgetting the name… The architecure is amazing .. known for the rare stone carvings.. apart from the peace, architecture and myth my other treat on this visit was the 4 year old teen camel Kaalu… he gave me a cool ride in the nearby fort area…

by now we are hungry like wolves and finish 4 aalo paranthas each and a hot glass of ilaychi milk :)

And then comes the moment… we decide to travel to Sam again.. this time in broad daylight so that I can see the sand… feel it better… live it with all my senses …

We are on our way to Sam and the stones on the sides of the road slowly change into smaller stones.. and even smaller materials until I start seeing sand.. desert sand… thirsty yet beautiful… and we reach Sam… get down from the SUV... and I run onto it… I reach a high sand dune… all around me … I see it… ever changing in the wind… the dunes keep shifting shape and position right under your nose… every second… and the wind leaves beautiful wave marks … u make an impression with ur hand and u can see it fading out rt in front of you… its like... calm but always changing.. always fresh.. always new, pure, real, sand… i didnt wanna learn anything about life at this moment and i chose not to...

I spent around 15 – 20 min walking on the sand from dune to dune… and then we took a camel ride upto Thar… saw a small army camp there… we get down into a dune valley… relax and open our drinks….

THIS was the moment… ..............................................................


i feel it cud have been as good with a campfire at night… but the day time experience is not to be missed… when u can see as far as ur sight goes…. Either sky or desert…

On our way back we visited the Gadisar lake, Jaisalmer fort and well… Maanvar again… the place had caught our fancy…. Drinks poured and souls chatted…hearts felt glad…there was a live rajsthani folk dance performance and I got to do a “turn your world around” with two pretty lasses in ghaghra and whtever the traditional dress is… this consumed another 5hrs ..

and then we reach jodhpur … see the mehrangarh fort next day morning and leave back for Bombay…
the auto trip from borivili to andheri shakes me out of my dream trip and I say,… well back to Bombay.. with “aap ki kashish” blaring out loudly in my ears thru the huge rick speakers…

Time was less…
And time was more

theres still some sand in my shoes… there will always be…

too much crimson

like a true human being i'd like start with a lie... i think i dont understand life...

where as.. i have huge misperceptions that in fact I DO... and one of the examples is this blog.. which shall claim to display, manifest and possibly crimsonify life for the benefit of myself, friends, strangers and argumentators or philosphisers alike....

i believe there are only two types of beings in this universe... human beings or philosophisers...
philosophers are different from philosophisers and for all practical purposes are human beings...

i'd like to make clear that contempt and sarcasm are not my tools and i shall steer away from them unless i am drunk and typing...

rt now i am drunk..

and typing..

.. although i am a very positive person... and am hopeful and confident that every life has to come to an end ... i feel that people will not realise this unless they concsiously try and LIVE every moment... otherwise we are all in fact dieing...

NOW... wish it was that easy... the fact is that your definition of 'LIVING' is bound to change 11 out of 10 times... and u'll be left groping for u dont even know what...

so on this positive note i start...